Why People Don't Trust Real Estate Agents.

Why People Don’t Trust Real Estate Agents…
By Stacey Deville, M.F.S.

I’ve spent the majority of the last 20+ years in law enforcement, as a crime scene investigator and, for the past 12+ years, as a police officer in a reserve/on-call capacity. And let me tell you, I completely understand why people don’t trust real estate agents. 

I came from a world bound by ethics, brotherhood, and real consequences. So when I stepped into real estate, I was stunned. I’ve met some of the worst people in this industry, and that’s not a jab. That’s reality. I get why people don’t trust us. In fact, I agree with them.

Let’s be honest: just about anyone can become a real estate agent. Pay your dues, pass a test, and you’re suddenly advising people on one of the biggest financial decisions of their lives. When I started, you couldn’t even apply if you had a criminal record. That standard has since softened and so has the integrity. 

Now let’s address the elephant in the room: the commission check. Most people believe agents are in it for the money. And truthfully? In many cases, they’re right. A lot of folks think it’s easy money. The industry has a reputation for being commission-hungry, transactional, and shallow, and too often, agents live up to that stereotype. The icky used car salesman feel.

I get it. When I was making less than $30k as a crime scene investigator, with a bachelor’s and master’s degree in forensic science, my first real estate check shocked me. "Wait, I just made that in one deal?" It took me half a year to earn that in law enforcement. So I understand the appeal. But that doesn’t make it feel any less slimy especially when done purely for financial reasons. It can feel like a used car sales pitch. Remember Danny DeVito in Matilda, hawking lemons and smiling wide as he sold that piece of a car to the unsuspecting person. It’s a reputation we’ve earned, often by our own hands with the majority not caring after the check is cashed.

These days, everyone and their mother is an agent: your friend, your cousin, your hairstylist, your dog groomer’s niece. And instead of choosing experience, clients go with someone they know. I’ve lost multi-million dollar listings to agents who were licensed for three weeks. One even walked through my luxury listing, then had the nerve to contact my client directly, criticizing my marketing approach despite having zero sales.

Familiarity doesn’t equal experience. Would you trust your best friend’s brother to perform heart surgery straight out of med school? Would you let a first-year dental student handle your root canal? Then why trust your biggest financial transaction to someone who just passed an online course?

​Then there are what I call the ambulance chasers. If you’ve ever had a listing go off the market, you know who I mean. The ones who call immediately, desperate to poach your business. They don’t ask why you pulled it. They just bash your agent and offer big promises. None of which ever equate and those sellers are left angry and bitter towards the industry.

The trash-talking is constant in this industry. The professional unity? Nonexistent. I told my husband it’s the first job I’ve had where I believe someone would trip me to steal my listing. Metaphorically, but also not. One agent refused to show my listing, then went behind my back, contacting my client and claiming they could get a higher price. They wanted to double-end the deal. I stepped away and let it play out. Six months later? No sale. No buyer. Just another burned bridge and a disappointed seller.

And don’t get me started on agents who disappear after payday. No follow-up. No relationship. That’s not just bad service, it’s unethical.

In law enforcement, we are held to a code of ethics. There are bad eggs, sure, but they get weeded out. In real estate? I’ve never once heard of someone losing their license over unethical behavior. Ask any experienced agent about regulation, and they’ll laugh. At best, it’s a slap on the wrist.

Here’s a story that still stings: I had buyers moving from California, referred to me through a close client. I spent a weekend showing them 15 homes, missing my kid’s parties, soccer games, even church, which, if you know me, you know is a big deal. I poured into them. After dropping them off to discuss offers, I got a call from my lender: “Congrats on your clients putting in an offer!” But we hadn’t. Turns out, an agent I contacted to show an off-market property went behind my back, found my clients online, and offered them a deal at a lower price, plus a rebate if they dropped me and used her.

She violated every ethical standard. And yet, nothing happened. My broker told me she had done this five times in the last six weeks. She’s still one of the top-ranked agents. Why? Because no one holds her accountable. Fighting it costs time and money, and nothing gets enforced anyway so no one does a single thing but turns a blind eye. The poor seller or buyer gets screwed and eventually hates every last one of us. They have been burned, and they have every right to feel this way. We should all feel this way.

Imagine filing a complaint with a police department or hospital and no one caring. That’s what it’s like here. Every seasoned agent I know can rattle off 15 names of agents to avoid.

Why? Because for many, it’s all about the check.

Let’s Break Down That Commission Check

Everyone sees that $12,000 commission and thinks it’s easy money. Occasionally, sure. Some deals are smooth. But most are not. I’ve worked with buyers for over two years before they finally purchased. I’ve shown 20+ homes, nights and weekends, missed family dinners, juggled kids, and been ghosted the week they go under contract with someone else, on a home I showed them, with the lender I introduced them to.

And that check? It’s not all yours. Consider this:

• Signs & lockboxes: $2,000
• Marketing for a luxury listing: $15,000–$20,000 (yes, out of pocket)
• MLS and listing platform fees
• Broker splits: Often 70/30 (goodbye $3k–$5k)
• Gas, admin work, photography, staging, videography 
• And don’t forget taxes (we’re 1099 contractors)

By the time it’s said and done, you might clear $4,000–$5,000 sometimes after 100 hours of work, therapy-level emotional support, and negotiations worthy of a courtroom.

Meanwhile, the public sees the highlight reel:

• A post about multiple offers. Look at me, I’m the best but failing to mention the other 25 deals that had 0 offers or multiple price reductions to get there.
• A selfie with smiling buyers.
• A balloon arch and a "SOLD" sign.

What they don’t see:

• The failed deals.
• The emotional toll.
• The sunk costs from listings that don’t sell.
• The colleagues who undercut you.

The real estate industry is flooded with agents who smile to your face while hoping you fail. Newbies undercut veterans and disappear months later when they realize this isn’t quick money. This business is about connection, consistency, and care.

Here’s a stat: in 2023, Texas had over 150,000 licensed agents. A small percentage did more than two deals a year. And only about 1% of agents sell the majority of homes.

If We Want Trust, We Have to EARN It

Want to be seen as a professional? Then act like one.

Stop glamorizing the paycheck. Stop turning a blind eye to bad behavior. Stop letting just anyone in the door. I had a client who said she wanted to become an agent after watching me. She told me she’d only work luxury listings and wouldn’t touch anything under $1 million because it wasn’t worth her time. She wasn’t even licensed yet. How long did she last? One year. Zero deals.

Here’s the truth: you work the $20k deals like they’re $2 million. Because one day, they will be. Serve your people. Pour into your clients. Build something worth believing in. And do right even when no one is looking.
One of my lowest-priced deals this year came from a referral. It was under $200k. I worked it just as hard as my $3 million listings. Because everyone deserves that level of excellence.

To the clients out there: ask the hard questions. The good agents are out there. We show up. We serve. We stay. And sometimes we aren’t the ones in front of the camera promoting ourselves, because we just aren’t those people. 

But for everyone else still chasing shortcuts and gimmicks… keep doing what you’re doing. And one day, when the dust settles, you’ll see why the agents who have been around 5, 10, 15 years are still standing.

If you’ve been burned before, I’m sorry. You deserve better. The good agents are out here, those who’ve put in the time, paid the price, and keep showing up. You don’t need perfection. You need someone who cares more about your outcome than their commission. And that’s who you should hire.

We didn’t get lucky. We earned it.